I was gleefully cruel to others, especially to other children. After an incident where I burned my hand on the stove and nearly set the house on fire, she started leaving me at daycare centers instead. This made me become very self-reliant early on, and instead of being told not to do certain things, I learned by experience.
When I was able to walk and get around on my own, she felt comfortable leaving me by myself while she went to school for a few hours. According to my mother, I rarely cried as a baby.
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But my kids know I loved my mom dearly and I still miss her, with all her defects, many of which were inevitable results of being part of a certain generation and their ideas about how to best raise kids. I know that I told my kids some things about my mom when she was not at her best, that she probably would have hated hearing. I’m sure that they will have some negative things to say about me, as I m for sure not perfect, but I hope that they can discuss my defects with affection, because my defects were not as bad as to override all the 2Pac Dear Mama shirt in addition I really love this love.
Not because of my ego, but because if they have positive memories, but because it would means that I did a good job as a mother and they will be happy, well adjusted human beings, and good parents because of that at least in part. I would hope that they will be honest with their kids and that they will have many positive things to say about me. Honestly, it’s up to my children how they will want to talk about me when I’m dead (and when I’m alive too).
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